Tuesday, January 8, 2013

I Need Some Advice...

Man have I been lazy lately. Yesterday, I did attempt some chores. I actually got the dishes done but only a couple loads of laundry actually made it through the wash and dry cycles. I go through phases where I don't want to do anything, mainly in protest because my children have not been taught properly the art of chores and why we must do them. I am admitting right now, that I am lax in discipline. In a word, I'm weak.

Let me explain;

 
As a teenager, I did a lot of chores. I helped to raise my sisters from the time I was a preteen until I was 19 and got married. Cooking and cleaning was an everyday thing for me, and then there was the diaper changing and helping with homework while both of my parents worked to keep food on the table. Because of that, my childhood was limited to going to school, and coming straight home to help with my sisters. It was on rare occasion that I was able to hang out with friends or participate in sports. Now, I don't tell you this to put my mother or father down and say that I resent it, because I don't. I tell you this, because it explains why I parent the way I do. I want my children to do those things that I was not able to do. I don't want my kids to look back on their childhood and only remember that they had to do chores all the time.

This brings a big problem to light. You have probably figured it out by now and are screaming at your computer screen or rolling your eyes at me. I am limiting my children's abilities. I was given all of those chores as a child and now as an adult, I know how to do things. My children will not know how to do certain things when they get out on their own. My son will be able to go on his mission in about 5 years. I have a very short amount of time to teach him things that he should have been learning gradually over the years.

The other day we were doing our montly ward cleaning at our church building and Hyrum was vaccuming the carpet in the relief society room when I heard his friend making fun of him because he didn't know how to vaccum properly. I looked up from what I was doing and sure enough, I saw my almost 13 year old son pusing the vaccum only in the forward direction around the room. At that moment, a duh moment for sure, I realized that I was stifling my chilren. If I didn't teach Hyrum those things he needed to know, his wife would not be very happy with me.

Now that I have figured it out, admitted that I have been a horrible mother and acknowledged the wrong that I am doing, the question that remains is, how do I go about fixing the problem? How do I fix it so that they don't hate me for all of a sudden throwing these things on them or making it look like Mom is just being lazy and I'm just pawning it all off on to them. How do I coordinate the chores with extra curricular activies? If someone has any advice, I am open to it.

Again, Mother, if you're reading this...I am thankful that I know how to do these things that I had to do as a teenager because I am able to take care of my family to this day.

1 comment:

  1. Do chores with them, that way you are teaching them how to do and sharing in the job. It teaches them responsibility and you are not expecting them to do it all by them selves.....lighten the load and you aren't having to do it all yourself either.....win win....

    ReplyDelete